Silvia was 12 years old when she was raped by a friend considered very trustworthy by her family in Guatemala.
“My parents never found out. I thought it was my fault, and since my rapist threatened to hurt one of my brothers if he told it, I couldn’t tell anyone,” says Silvia.
Silvia says that the rape cut short her dreams. “I separated from my friends. I isolated myself. I felt different, strange. I lost my childhood. Nothing amused me. It was something very ugly, I just cried and cried; and no one understood what was happening to me. My mother never knew what the reason for my sadness was. “I didn’t dare tell him.”
At age 20, he emigrated to the United States.
“I didn’t understand everything that was happening to me. I got into an abusive relationship, I didn’t trust anyone. It was very difficult to live like that.”
When she was reported at school for having hit her son who is hyperactive, a social worker came to visit her, who instead of harming her, helped her.
“I will never forget that he sent me to an agency where they realized everything I had been carrying: hatred, remorse, low self-esteem, depression, interacting with abusive people.”
He acknowledges that in the midst of his desperation, he hit his son.
“That social worker was a blessing. It was the beginning of my healing. She provided emergency services not only to me but to my family. “I met more women survivors, and I gave myself the courage to talk about what happened to me.”
This is how, at the age of 25, she began to receive therapy for the first time and deal with the impact of the rape she suffered as a child.
“At 40 years old, I feel fulfilled and live happily; and if something happens to me or a problem arises, I think about the solution.”
The non-profit organization East Los Angeles Women’s Center (ELAWC), dedicated to women, girls and their families living free from violence and abuse, held the Invisible arts and music festival to highlight Sexual Assault Awareness Month.
Under the motto red lips, earrings on, look how you want, dance how you want, be brave, be passionate and be invinciblewomen survivors of sexual violence danced to the music of cumbia on the esplanade of the historic General Hospital.
Daniella Herrera, a specialist in sexual assault, said that throughout the month of April they held events to raise awareness about sexual assault and the services they have in the East Los Angeles Women’s Center and in the Wellness Center.
“Our services include different types of support, individual therapies, housing and other basic needs.”
Regarding the music festival, he said that it is a campaign that they have carried out in the last three years to say that no matter how a woman dresses, sexual violence is not justified.
“It comes from the idea that at least in Latin culture, sometimes if you put on lipstick, they think you’re a woman of the night. “We want to break the stigma and say that how we dress does not justify any type of violence against my body and myself.”
What is sexual assault
The specialist on the subject says that it covers a variety of violations of a sexual nature against a human being, and can be physical, coercion and sexual harassment.
“It can occur at the place of employment. We have a program for women who work in the industry, where typically some boss or person in authority sexually harasses them and they are afraid to file a report because they need the job, and without the job they cannot survive; and that puts them in a very difficult situation.”
It specifies that when someone has been sexually raped, they have access to a Sexual Assault Response Team (SART) that puts them in contact with health and mental services; and includes a forensic examination to collect evidence.
“Ideally we would like the person to report to the police, since they relate the zip code where the assault occurred, and this is very important because they can take the person to the hospital where they do the exam free of charge.”
She stated that depending on the jurisdiction, there are different local rape centers where they will send people to the hospital or the police station to meet you and help you.
“When the person does not report, it prevents them from receiving the help they need. People who do not want to go to the police can go to the Santa Monica Rape Trauma Center where doctors and nurses will report the victim as Jane Doe, “But they don’t have to interact with the police.”
Unfortunately, he said that every 68 seconds there is a sexual assault, but they do not have the same number of reports and complaints.
“We know that for various reasons, sexually assaulted people do not report, and by not doing so, they are not linked to crucial health services, and DNA evidence cannot be collected.”
It regrets that in this country there is no term for feminicide, but they know that sexual violence against women occurs at alarming rates and is not reported.
“What we try to do with these events is create a bridge with the community to tell them that if they have ever suffered a sexual assault or been a victim of domestic violence, there are services to help them with therapy not only for the person affected but for the family. whole because trauma can affect several generations”.
Diana Rodríguez, a family therapist, says every sexual assault survivor is different.
“Sometimes, they come ready to talk and take action; and other times, they need validation and more support because it is the first time they are sharing their story.”
He says it’s happened to him a few times, and he’s the first person the victim has shared their story with, which is really moving and powerful.
“What we see a lot of is post-traumatic stress disorder, depression and anxiety related to the assault. Many times they can develop obsessive-compulsive disorder because of anxiety about the assault.”
How can we as a community help victims of sexual assault?
“That’s what this event is about, changing the social stigmas related to sexual assault. Therefore, we must remove blame from the victims and believe in the survivors because many times we do not believe them, especially in Latin culture, we ask them how they were dressed, what they did to be sexually assaulted. “We focus on the victim instead of the perpetrator.”
She says that many times when they share that they suffered a sexual assault, families do not believe them.
“And when it happens, it’s usually someone we know, a family member, a friend, people we trust and who are sometimes well-regarded in the community, and then no one believes the survivors.”
Then cultural aspects, religion, and comments come in that we shouldn’t dress a certain way, or what happened to us because we were out after a certain time.
“To that we must add that there is a lot of shame and sexual assault is normalized in the community. “We’ve had an entire generation of women who talk about sexual assault with ‘I’m robbed.'”
To report sexual assault and ask for help, call 1-800-585-6231.